Interracial relationships: Why they happen, and the struggles the people in them have

Holding an inter-racial relationship is a great struggle for those who choose to cross racial boundaries. People who engage in such a relationship show maturity, operate with an open mind, and exhibit respect for all God’s beings, regardless of skin color. Society today is still not entirely accepting of inter-racial relationships. Prejudices and unfair treatment sill exist.

Love should have no boundaries at all. Love cannot be categorized into a race. Racism in today’s society is slowly decreasing, but still takes place. Society has become more tolerant with other races and inter-racial marriages and dating. The perception is a racist person comes from how they were raised or what they saw during the juvenile years.

Being brought up in a racist manner, can lead them in perceiving the world how they thin it “should” be. With these thoughts relations and marriages come up. To racist individuals a certain view on how intimate human relations should be conducted is developed. A racist persona believes their race is superior to another and does not believe in mixing or un-purifying their race should occur. If this does occur the “mixer” and “mixee” of the relationship get labeled and called names.

Labels are something that goes for all people, but a racial label is one more known. Derogatory terms are part of some people’s everyday vocabulary. These would include the terms “nigger”, “spic”, “chink”, “dego”, “cracker”, and “wetback”. These phrases are things many couples hear daily from family, friends, television, and on the street. Inter-racial couples get labeled constantly. Labels such as the racial slurs mentioned above are bad. Many whites that frequently date or marry black men or women are referred to as “nigger loves” and many blacks that date whites are said to have “jungle fever”. Aside from this hatred, there is praise for mixed relationships and much other praise has to do with love and seeing the inside, not ones color.

Praise for inter-racial relationships come from those without prejudices or ignorance. Many people today, as well as social experts believe the mixing of races will soon breed out hate and racism. Many people who are multi or bi-racial try to get those who discourage mixing races, to see a different light. A mixed or multi-racial family is said to have more strengths than a single race family. These families primarily live in a multi-cultural area and have of course, multi-cultural children. These children are said to be the new leaders in the fight against racism. Praise of a person for making a choice based on love is far more courageous than being a cowardly discouraging human against someone’s skin. In literature there is even praise of interracial relationships. The following is an excerpt of a poem entitled “Love is far more various than Race” by Gordon Nicholas: “Love is far more various than Race, it goes deeper than a person’s skin. It reaches to the heart, which is the same, in all-human race. It is the name of a hundred thousand feelings held within. Yearning to be consumed in an embrace.”(Nicholas, Poems for Free)

Along with this praise is that of praising and seeing different races. Many today, think this is just a black and white issue. However, inter-racial relationships are also between Caucasians and Hispanics, Chinese and Africans, or any other combinations of races. That is where many are wronged. Other cultures deal with racism from other cultures. Many of the families of these other cultures discourage and inter-racial relationship. Even though, they themselves may be in one. Some only see a problem when you mix African-American and Caucasian. If you can accept a Hispanic and Caucasian relationship, why not a black and white? This is a question frequently asked to those against inter-racial relationships.

Frequently, African Americans answer this by saying that the black was and still is always inferior to the Caucasian man. So they say why mix with the race that “holds” them down and has oppressed them for many years. For Caucasians, they claim the African Americans merely cause problems, troubles, and are not intelligent. So basically many of the Caucasians think a black and white child will result as disobedient, quarrelsome and unintelligent.( Williams, 5,15)

The emotional impact of an inter-racial relationship is very harmful, astounding, and sometimes depressing. Such emotions can run high and lead to divorces, separations, and breakups. All of this due to the opposing family, friends, and society. People who came to the decision to enter and interracial relationship soon learn the pressures and distresses that it can give.

Pressure from families is possibly the worst kind and can lead to emotional harm. Families go so far as to disown their son, daughters, or grandchildren. They exclude them from the rest of their live and all family functions. Disowning a person for their open mind and love for an opposite race is a hard thought to process for those who are disowned. Why not love me for me, and accept me for my tolerances? This is what frequently goes thought inter-racial couples heads. Sometimes the emotional distress and harm leads to depression, suicide, or addiction to alcohol or drugs. (Williams 38-40)

Children of inter-racial marriage or relationships often go through a tough emotional time. Being bi-racial often leads to a child being called names and having singles raced children ask many questions. At the same time this child may not have many friends because the parents of others do not accept the bi-racial child.

A bi-racial child in a racist society is seen as a product of evil, a confused human and something that cannot be accepted into or by their own races. These children often get many slurs such as “oreo”, “half-breed”, or “mutt”. Simple because their parents chose love over skin color. Family members or peers tell the child to choose a race and stick with it. We heard of mixed children being harassed and beaten up by a single raced person. These children think that this bi-racial person is tainting their single raced culture, merely with their presence. (Burello, Diversity Training Group).

There are many races that mix in today’s society. Many Hispanics, Asians, Jewish, and Arabic’s go outside their races. Many combinations of race occur today and white these combinations some experts say the “majority” Caucasian race, will soon be the minority. Thus leaving the multi-cultural society the majority.

The dawn on this new multicultural society, was said to have started when the anti-miscegenation laws were passed. These laws were broken and dissolved in 1967, when the Loving vs. Virginia case took place. (Marriages and Relationships, website). With the fall of this law, segregation broke down and schools stared mixing students, jobs started accepting other races and public places were mostly open to all. The dissolving of these laws was like a rolling rock. Other stares started to law off of the law or dissolve it as well. Although Alabama, did not dissolve this law until the year 2000. Immigrants from around the globe, were also less segregated and more accepted because people seen how loves overcomes color or heritage. The expansion of people and races in the United States and around the world can be a great factor in why cross- relations take place. There’s is a larger choice of male and female companions.