Story About My Best Friend
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A long-term interpersonal relationship that I have the relational goal to maintain is my best friend, Sabrina. According to the textbook, ‘interpersonal communication is a dynamic form of communication between two (or more) people in which the messages ex- changed signif- icantly influence their thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and relationships’ (McCornack 9). Based on my personal experience, the interpersonal communication between my best friend and me could be described as peaceful and morally based on trust. However, because we are in different stages in our lives, we both have different friend circles and groups. This has gradually has caused us to spend less time with each other and more time with others. I do feel that if we had more time for one another, a significant improvement within our friend- ship and communication skills would appear.
A good rule of thumb when it comes to our friendship is to care more about doing what’s right than being right. When we got to know another, we got to know each other’s worst traits. It is easy to become cynical toward the negative aspects of someone else’s personality. It’s far more preferable to be compassionate. Compassion keeps both of us vulnerable instead of harsh and guarded. We choose not to see the world through a negative lens. To help maintain our friend- ship, we want to be always honest with each other, ‘to maintain your friendships, strive to keep this foundation solid by regularly doing things with your friends, and making time to talk.’ (Mc-Cornack 258) .Being able to offer and receive feedback from someone you trust is a gift that can easily be overlooked.
Until I met Sabrina, I thought in my heart that I had all the confidence I needed. However, after opening up about myself and listening to her, I realized I didn’t have power and confidence. I had only had arrogance and ego in dealing with those around me. Gradually, my perspective changed, and I began to see myself differently. She helped my self-concept in more ways then I can say, ‘the most important factor that distinguishes best friends is unqualified provision of identity support’ (McCornack 251). Much of my self-esteem and self-acceptance came from her support. Sabrina continues to challenge me, help me learn, help me to expand my mind. She helped me build my confidence, expose me to materials and messages that taught me about in- herent value.
Sabrina knows more about me and my behaviors more than I do myself. She remembers small details about me, like how I’m not too fond of onions. When she brings takeout, she makes sure there aren’t any onions on my food. As stated in the textbook, ‘self-disclosure appears to promote mental health and relieve stress.’ (McCornack 44). Disclosing my problems to her helps me work through my issues. It is satisfying to know that I have someone there for me during rough times. We are comfortable around one another, to tell the truth, and keep no secrets from each other. That’s what makes her my best friend. She is there in case I forget them myself, or I need a sanity check.
We don’t have a lot of perceptual barriers in our friendship. Most revolve around small concepts such as miscommunication that we resolve right away. However, there was one specificoccasion that almost tore our friendship apart. In high school, we had a terrible argument about a failed project. We decided to put it past us and focus on our friendship. While doing our home- work together, she handed her phone to show me a funny video. While I was watching, I came across a message from a particular group chat that comprises of her and my other two friends. I asked her permission to view the group. She had a blank expression on her face but told me to go ahead. I was in shock while going to their messages, as I read not such positive things about my- self. This caused my perception of her to go down. For a long time, I had lost the trust I had for her. As stated in the textbook, ‘not all betrayals are of equal standing, so think carefully about whether this incident is something you can learn with, or not.’ (McCornack 260). I gave our friendship a lot and concluded to forgive. This experience helped us both grow into better indi- viduals and friends. There was no looking back from then on.