Healthy Grief

It is healthy and natural to experience the reaction of grief in individuals at some time in their life. Grief initially occurs when individuals lose someone important whether it is after death or become broken hearted from a relationship, addiction, diagnosis of a sickness, and other difficult transitions that a person has to accept and learn in how to move forward in a healthy aspect in order to enjoy life. These examples in expressing different angles of grieving can lead to a physiological response and as a result it can create an unhealthy lifestyle. Dr. Elisabeth Kulber- Ross have worked with chronically ill patients in the medical setting, and provided support by caring and comforting them during their critical time from creating the model of “The Five Stages of Grief”. In this paper, I will discover the importance of the five stages of grief and compare and contrast it with the story of Job from the bible, discuss the joy and the grieving model, and finally I will explain how this research changed my views with the preferred method I use to deal with grief. In life people experience different magnitudes of losses whether it is being fired from a job or financial loss and losing a loved one.

This unexpected transition can drastically change a person, and each loss represents how a person needs to acknowledge the acceptance and adequately learn to continue in living life without it. The person who is bereaved needs to take time out to grieve and should work towards developing new roles, identities and relationships (Stroebe et al 2004). Furthermore, this specific principle is called the duel process and it essentially has five stages denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance (Kübler-Ross 1969). In the stage of denial enables people who grieving unexpected news to cushion in the pain as a result it leads to a level of resentment, and becoming envious. To come across the struggle of confronting the unpleasant reality, battling the anger with others and God, and trying to cope with the devastating experience by replacing something new in order to receive what is important to them from God is the stage of bargaining. The next stage is depression, people can easily become depress when they cannot get out of denial, as a result they become fragile, unexpected weight loss, and other unhealthy signs draws them to a dark place.

Last but not least. Acceptance is the stage where a person realizes and accepts that their loss of a loved one is not returning, and is gone. This does not mean that the person is going to be happy, but he will begin to feel peace (Torry, 2011). The story of Job’s life in the bible demonstrates important roles and values in the stages of grief. It was a misfortunate when Job went through the hardship of losing his possessions, his health, and children. Job did experience the stage of grief in denial; he had a difficult time digesting what happen to him when he has been faithful and loyal to God. He began to feel angry toward his close friends and God, after experiencing the stage of denial. Then he started to become depressed, everything was so devastating and overwhelming for him that he began to feel he was never born on earth.

Then, he started to contemplate and reflecting upon the past in how he could of done differently, and how he should have made better choices. After going through sorrows of being depressed he heard the powerful voices of God, and he spoke in reaching to him so he can view his suffering in a different perspective. In turn, he listened and was able to accept his new reality. This story definitely expresses lessons in life and states the importance in God and how he wants us to continue to be faithful to him no matter how unpleasant life gets for us. Essentially, it was God’s plan to enable Job’s suffering to strengthen and enrich his character to reveal a purpose behind his suffering. In addition, health professionals experience the feeling of joy to patients when they become sensitive and caring to the patient’s grieving feelings. When a person takes time to give their attention to them it allows a level of comfort to set and in that moment it transform into a joyous feeling.

The concept of the models of grief and the story of Job helped me to better comprehend the reason why we come across difficult stages in life, and now I have better knowledge in answering the questions when I was suffering with grief, for example why is this happening to me? In my personal opinion, since I do go through these stages of grief step by step my view has not change, and the method I use when I’m grieving is I immediately go to God. Because he is the almighty one and in any despair we might encounter with he will be with us. I have learned a valuable lesson from the story of Job that God is loyal to us, he does listens to our prayers, and he does not punish but tests our level of faithfulness. There is a powerful message through the act of suffering, it strengthens us and it brings a positive healthy restoration in our lives.

In conclusion, I have stated the importance of the five stages of grief and compare and contrast it with the story of Job from the bible, discuss the joy and the grieving model, and I explained how this research changed my views with the preferred method I use to deal with grief.

Reference

Kübler-Ross E (1969) On Death and Dying. Macmillan, New York NY.

Stroebe MS, Hansonn RO,Stroebe W, Schut H (Eds) (2004) Handbook of Bereavement Research.Consequences, Coping, and Care.Fourth edition. AmericanPsychological Association,Washington DC.

Torry, T. 2011. Coping With Grief – From Difficult Diagnoses to Medical Errors and Mistakes.Retrieved November 19, 2012, from http://patients.about.com/od/researchtreatmentoptions/ss/Coping-With-Grief-From- Difficult-Diagnoses-To-Medical-Errors-And-Mistakes_3.htm