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Developing a Strong Paragraph

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Topic Sentence – Make sure this sentence indicates the “purpose” of the paragraph The dreams of Tim O’Brian resemble the song “All Around Me” by Flyleaf. Supporting Sentence #1 – (Reason why TS is true)

In this song it says that you can feel a person all around you even if they are not actually there. Tim O’Brian can feel and hear Linda in his dreams even though she’s dead. Elaboration for reason #1 – (evidence, integrated quotation, or examples that extend from #1 – Analysis of evidence) — Be sure to CITE Within the book on page 230 O’Brian says, “I made up elaborate stories to bring Linda alive in my sleep. I invented my own dreams” (O’Brian 230). (this evidence/example/passage suggests that …)

This example shows that even though Linda is not actually there, he can feel her all around him like she was alive again. Supporting Sentence #2 – (Another reason why TS is true)
Furthermore, the song All Around Me explains that you must hold on to what you’re feeling. That’s very similar to what O’Brian does. He doesn’t want to let go of Linda. Elaboration for reason #2 – (evidence, integrated quotation, or examples that extend from #2 – Analysis of evidence) — Be sure to CITE This is explained on page 226 when O’Brian says, “The dead are never dead. We keep them alive with stories” (O’Brian 226). (this evidence/example/passage logically implies that …)

This evidence explains that O’Brian doesn’t let Linda go because he continues to tell stories about her. O’Brian is holding on to what he is feeling which is what the song says to do. Supporting Sentence #3 – (Another reason why TS is true)

In addition, the song by Flyleaf also states, “My hands are searching for you, I feel you on my fingertips.” This is similar to O’Brian searching for Linda in his dreams. Elaboration for reason #3 – (evidence, integrated quotation, or examples that extend from #3 – Analysis of evidence) — Be sure to CITE Tim O’Brian tells us clearly that he is searching for Linda when he says, “I’m skimming across the surface of my own history, moving fast, doing loops and spins, and when I take a high leap into the dark and come down thirty years later, I realize it was Tim trying to save Timmy’s life with a story” (O’Brian 233). (from this evidence, one can conclude that …)

This metaphor proves that O’Brian searches through his dreams to find Linda and to try and forget the horror of war. The power of imagination brings O’Brian’s mind to an ease which is similar to the song. O’Brian can feel the past on his fingertips. Concluding sentence – Summarize your points and provide final analysis. Without a doubt, O’Brian’s dreams and the song All Around Me show how easily dreams and memories can become a reality. In conclusion, both O’Brian and the song agree that you must hold on to what you are feeling.

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