Should Cohabitation Before Marriage be Encouraged?

In the 21 century, marriage is no longer considered as a life binding commitment to one person. A decrease in the number of marriages and an increase in cohabitation both have come in the wake of a large increase in divorce in the last thirty years (David G. Green, 2000). Cohabitation is more popular nowadays because the current generation would like to know whether they are compatible. They also can see the habit and character of their partner by living together. The cohabitation may be defined as an intimate sexual union between two unmarried partners who live together as husband and wife without legally marrying. Although cohabitation before marriage could perhaps bring advantages like provide companionship, financial benefits and marriage be more stable, there are also some disadvantages of cohabitation.

Firstly, opponents argue that the cohabitation provides companionship and compatibility. However, the rate of domestic violence among cohabitation couples are higher. Cohabitation also makes women more vulnerable to abuse ( Stephen, D. and Alysse M. ElHage , 2005). The violent relationship can lead to many negative effects such as alcohol problem, depression, aggression or suicide.

Besides, there also have a higher risk of physical, emotional and mental abuse due to the unstable cohabitation relationship. Even though living together can reduce the feel of loneliness for cohabitation couples, the personal space and privacy for each other also will be reduced. They have no freedom because everything cannot be hidden from one another and also they always cling for every free moment that can cause no sense of personal space. Therefore, a lot of people break their relationship in order to get more personal space.

Secondly, opponents argue that cohabitation before marriage can bring financial benefits. The cohabitation couples not only can cut the rent costs in half, they also can split the utility bills, cable and other expenses. So, it can let the couples to save more money on the monthly cost of living that can be used for future. In fact, however, mostly the males who pay the expenses. It is because they think it is a sign of gentlemanliness.

Besides, the quarrels and conflicts will occur if someone spend too recklessly. For example, the cohabitation couples will finger point as the women frittering the finances on shoes and handbags or the men were out drinking. This can cause misunderstanding that may lead to a break up. Moreover, it would be trouble if the cohabitation couples open a joint checking account. This is because it is hard to split up the account equally to them and no legal protection for the couple who live together but did not get married.

Another argument supported that the marriage can be more stable by cohabitation before marriage. However, the couple who cohabit before are much more likely to divorce afterwards. Cohabitation before marriage not only increases the chances of divorce, also increases the chance of an unsuccessful marriage (The Survivors Club Staff , 2011). It is because the cohabitation couples often start cohabitation with different motives. The women will agree the cohabitation is because they think it can lead to a marriage.

But for the men, the cohabitation may be a way to defer the marriage because they have no idea what they actually want. Besides, the cohabitation couples are more concerned with the satisfaction that obtain from the other. It is different if compared with the marriage as the marriage is more on giving satisfaction to the other person. Therefore, the cohabitation not only failed to encourage affection between cohabitation couple, it will lead to alienation of mutual affection. The single parent homes will be caused by the divorce or ending the relationship of cohabitation.

Finally, because of cohabitation before marriage, there are many negative consequences. The affection of cohabitation couples will be affected by many ways and eventually lead to break up. Besides, it not only affects the couples and but also the children. The children that grow up in the single parent will be affected.

The effects of a single-parent home on the behaviour of child can be far-reaching and include many areas of life, from academic achievement to social habits (Marnie.K, 2010). In conclusion, although cohabitation before marriage has beneficial facts for the couples, the disadvantages still outweigh the advantages. Marriages preceded by cohabitation have been considered to be more likely to end in divorce than marriages not preceded by cohabitation (Cohen, Blair A. ,1991). Therefore, cohabitation is not a good way to a test of marriage or to avoid divorce.